Day 106 - Regret, Reflect, and Restart

I wish I could say that I've been kicking ass, and just not writing this blog because I've been so busy working out, but I can't. I haven't given up completely - I still work out 3 or 4 days a week. The problem is I'm in a rut. The classes I used to take (Lift and Sculpt, Spinning, Yoga) are starting to feel routine and boring. That's why I've started working out at home more, but I feel like I'm not getting the same workout. I not working out for nearly as long, and definitely not at same level of exhaustion. I take that back. During some workouts - like interval sprinting on the treadmill - I'm beat after 30 minutes. But I used to be beat after Spinning, and that lasted for 50 minutes.

So now, I work out 3 days a week, but it's for a total of 90 minutes instead of close to 200. And that makes a big difference. This is why I can't be surprised that after over 100 days, I'm in the same place I was after 70 days. When, in reality, if I had been pushing myself like I told myself I would, who knows where I'd be or what changes I'd see in myself.

This isn't the first time I've done this, and I wish I knew why I did these things. I get super excited about something in the beginning - working out, embroidery, baking - and it almost becomes an obsession. But then, inevitably, I start to get bored with it, and make excuses as to why I'm not into anymore, and then forget about it and move on. But I don't want to do that with working out. And the rational side of me knows that, and screams at me to not let it happen, but yet for the past month it has. At least I haven't completely stopped, but if I'm being honest with myself I've only been going at 50%.

Has this ever happened to anyone else? How do you get past it? Maybe I just need to change up my workouts ever few months so that I stay excited with it. Or maybe I just need to suck it up and realize that I may not always enjoy working out, but it necessary and I need to stop bitching. I think it's a combination of the 2, with an emphasis on the personal ass kicking. I just feel so tired of my bullshit. I can pay lip service until I'm blue in the face, but when push comes to shove I quit. Or I half ass it. And I don't want to anymore, but I don't know what to do.

So here is my plan. Knowing what I know about myself, I realize that it may not be realistic to work out for an hour a day, 6 days a week. Right now that is. Would I like to work up to that? Hell yeah! But you know what I can do right now? 30 minutes a day, 5 days a week. 30 minutes of cardio - walking, jogging, whatever it might be, but 30 minutes 5 days a week. And I know that I want to work strength training in there as well, 2 days a week to start.

Now you might be thinking that this sounds crazy, and I'm once again setting myself up to fail because this requires me to do something every day. But this plan is flexible. Lets say I'm going out after work one day. So I take what I'm supposed to do that day and add it to a day that I'm doing strength training, or vice versa. But I am purposely making this tough on me, so I can prove to myself that I can do it. And really, what's 30 minutes a day? NOTHING. And once I get into that routine, let's say 1 month from now (Day 136), I'll bump it up to 45 minutes a day. By then the routine will be set (hopefully) and I'll just bump up the amount of time.

I really think I can do this. I mean, I don't have a choice do I? If I don't I'll just keep coasting along, doing the minimum, and then feeling down that I'm not improving. Well no shit Sherlock! If you put in the minimum you get out the minimum. Sure, I've got more muscle definition, and my endurance is more than it was back in January, but there's still fat there. I'm still not as healthy as I want to be. So it's now or never. If I don't step it up I might as well stop altogether, because there's no point otherwise.

So, that's where I am right now. I'm restarting my quest to get healthy - 106 days in. Better now than never, right?

~Catie